“Greetings, Archchancellor Verdriss,” said the woman on the screen. “My name is Elizabeth Drake. I am the negotiator assigned to the Korlis Collective. On behalf of the human race and planet Earth, I thank you for contacting us today.”
 

“You speak our language!” the Archchancellor exclaimed in surprise.
 

“Fluently.” The human woman smiled politely. She wore a stark blue uniform, with the silver emblem of the United Earth Government emblazoned over her left breast. “Each of our negotiators is assigned to a particular species,” she explained. “I am assigned to yours. To perform my role, I am expected to do more than just learn your language: I must also study your history, art, literature, and current events.”
 

“You’ve been watching us?” Verdiss asked, frowning slightly.
 

“We may not yet possess the technology to travel faster than light,” the negotiator reminded him, “but we have been receiving your public broadcasts for some time. It is our hope that by studying potential allies, we might be in a better position to bargain with them should they choose to contact us. It is, after all, very difficult to negotiate with someone whom you don’t understand.”
 

A nearby explosion shook the building, causing the Archchancellor to flinch. “If what you say is true,” he said hurriedly, “then you already know why I’ve called.”
 

The negotiator nodded. “The Korlis Collective is currently engaged in a conflict with the Ber-Sha. A conflict which you have been losing.” She turned her head briefly, consulting a display that Verdiss couldn’t see. “According to our latest reports, you have lost control of all outer planets in your system. A contingent of Ber-Sha warships now surrounds your homeworld of Isstek, where your capital city is being bombarded.” She looked back to the Archchancellor. “Is that an accurate summary of your current situation?”
 

Verdiss winced, looking down at the table for a moment. “Yes,” he admitted, unwilling to meet her gaze. Then, raising his eyes reluctantly: “Can you help us?”
 

The negotiator gave a pleased smile. “Of course,” she said. Again, her focus moved off-screen. Verdiss saw her hands typing busily as she read aloud. “As we speak, three hundred UEG warships are stationed at the coordinates I am sending you now. They have spent the last six months practicing maneuvers based on our analysis of the Ber-Sha’s military tactics. We are confident we can defeat them. All you have to do is open a warp gate, and we should arrive at Isstek within minutes.”
 

The Archchancellor saw his console light up as the coordinates were received. He breathed a sigh of relief. “My people would be eternally in your debt, Miss Drake,” he said. Then, steeling himself, he asked the question he had been dreading. “But I am no fool. What does Earth want in exchange for its assistance?”
 

The woman turned back to the screen, looking him directly in the eyes. “Our price is simple, Archchancellor,” she said. “We want a warp key.”
 

Verdiss shook his head. “We can’t. Please… anything else and we will gladly pay it.”
 

The negotiator was silent for a time, eyeing him coolly. She licked her lips. “On Earth,” she said eventually, “my people tell stories about a fictional creature known as a genie. The genie is described as immensely powerful—able to grant you any wish you might desire. But it is trapped inside a simple lamp, unable to free itself.” She spread her hands, palm-up, as if proffering all of humanity for his inspection. “We are a planet full of genies, Archchancellor. But without faster-than-light travel, we are prisoners in the vastness of space. Help us. Open the warp gate.”
 

“You don’t understand,” he protested. “We can’t. There are rules. Your species has been declared too dangerous for now. If we give you a warp key, the council will—"
 

The negotiator’s voice was ice. “We are aware of the sanctions against us,” she said. “You called us, Archchancellor. You knew what our price would be.”
 

It was the Archchancellor’s turn for silence. Another explosion struck nearby, causing the communications screen to flicker.
 

“With all due respect,” said the negotiator, “you don’t have much time. Your fleet is in ruins. Your people are dying. The longer you wait, the less of your planet you will be able to salvage. You can worry about the council’s reaction when the Ber-Sha are defeated. For now… Open. The gate.”
 

Verdiss frowned, turning away from the strange alien woman to look out the nearest window at the city he loved. Pillars of smoke rose in the distance—buildings that had once been architectural marvels, now turned to flaming ruin. Over the low rumble of the Ber-Sha’s bombardment, he could hear the sirens of the emergency crews.

To hell with the council, he thought.
 

“Fine,” he whispered. He typed a short command into his console, specifying the coordinates he’d been given. After a few seconds, a red light appeared on the panel. “The gate is open. Save my people, Miss Drake. You will have your warp key.”
 

“Excellent!” she declared. “Our ships are entering the warp gate now. We expect complete victory within three of your solar days, with losses estimated at less than fifty percent.”
 

Verdiss gasped. “Fifty percent?!” he asked in shock. “I... I had no idea! I thought with the size of your fleet, perhaps…” He trailed off, imagining the loss of life he had just agreed to. “Earth would give so much, just to save Isstek?”
 

This time, the human’s smile had no warmth in it. “You misunderstand, Archchancellor. Our agreement was the warp technology in exchange for your safety, and the safety of your planet. To accomplish this, we will be destroying the entire Ber-Sha fleet. We will eliminate the ships that are currently bombarding your planet, and then we will use the warp key to hunt down and destroy the rest. All of them. Everywhere.”
 

The Archchancellor blanched. “That isn’t what we asked for,” he protested. “The majority of the Ber-Sha’s forces are stationed around their homeworld. Once the contingent attacking Isstek is defeated, they’ll open negotiations and we can—”
 

She cut him off. “They are the enemy, Archcancellor,” she said, as calmly as if she were reminding him that water is wet. “Trust us on this. In exchange for FTL technology, we have agreed to attack a powerful species. It is in our best interest—and yours—to ensure that anyone watching this interaction appreciates how seriously we take our commitments to our new allies. I guarantee you, it will be some time before anyone works up the courage to threaten your homeworld again.”
 

Verdriss slumped back in his chair. On his console, green indicator lights had already begun to appear. They blinked into existence by the dozens, quickly filling his display. The sounds of bombardment ceased abruptly as the Ber-Sha desperately swung about, attempting to target the incoming human fleet.
 

He looked up from the display, swallowing a sudden lump in his throat. “Miss Drake,” he said hoarsely, “in those stories you mentioned. About the genies...”
 

“Yes?”
 

“Do they ever explain why they were imprisoned in the first place?”
 

In her defense, she did not smirk. “It was a pleasure doing business with you, Archchancellor," she said instead. "Our people will be there to collect the warp key shortly.”
 

The screen went black. And in the skies above, three hundred human warships opened fire.